


Sacrifices made

by Cassiara



Category: Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, Supernatural
Genre: Abuse, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Hunger Games Setting, Character Death, Depression, Dubious Consent, Gore, Hunger Games, M/M, Minor Character Death, Past Abuse, Prostitute Dean, Prostitution, Self-Harm, Slash, depressed!Dean
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-10
Updated: 2015-04-09
Packaged: 2018-01-15 05:45:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,202
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1293520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cassiara/pseuds/Cassiara
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean and Sam Winchester lives in district 8. The story begins before the 48th hunger game. Dean does anything he can to keep Sam alive and thriving in the poorest district after their fathers death. This is the story of Deans life, his love for his brother and the lives he inspires. <br/>Currently ABANDONDED. I have a few more chapters written out for this story, but I'm lacking the inspiration to finish it. I might one day, but for now I'm working on other projects.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This fic desperatly needs a Beta as english is not my first language. If you are intersted please send me a message or leave a comment :)

"Dad, don't go. Please dad. Don't leave us." Dean begs his father again. The father that is currently standing in the doorway, dressed in a peacekeeper outfit he has stolen from work. "The only upside to living in district 8" he had told his son when he was caught sneaking home piece after piece of the uniform, "we have access to disguises when we need them." He had never told Dean what the uniform was for. Until now that is. 

"Dean, I have to go! I need to find district 13 and help them start a new rebellion. I need to avenge your mothers death." John looks at Dean with pleading eyes, as if begging Dean to understand. 

Dean doesn't understand, district 13 was wiped from the face of the earth by nuclear bombs almost fifty years ago. There is no more district 13. They've had this argument before though. His dad conspires, and Dean tries to talk him out of it. He doesn't think that will work this time, so he tries a different approach. 

"Mom died in a fire at the factory dad, it was an accident. There is nothing to take revenge for! And what about S.." 

He's stopped from finishing the sentence by a shocking pain to his nose. He hadn't seen the punch coming. Dean blinks at his father through watery eyes, pain blooming from the center of his face. 

John looks furious, eyes wide and nostrils flaring. "Don't say that Dean. Don't ever say that!" it looks like he wants to shout, but he keeps it down to an enraged whisper. 

They've become good at having their arguments in hushed tones so the neighbors won't hear them. "Your mom would never have died at the factory if it wasn't for the Capitol. She wouldn't even have been in that place if it wasn't for them. So don't ever think that they aren't to blame." 

His dad is staring at him, as if expecting realization to hit and for Dean to apologize. Dean doesn't. He can feel blood running from his nose, down his chin and soaking the only shirt he owns. He wants to yell at his father. Scream at him for always doing this, for making him worry. Making him take care of Sam, his little brother. Making him grow up too soon. 

He wants to cry, because his face is starting to throb, and he wants someone to comfort him. The one that should be comforting him, however, is the one that inflicted the pain. Dean chooses to ignore it. He ignores the pain in his face, it's not like being hit is a new thing, and he ignores his own fear and sadness. 

"What about Sam?" he tries instead. His last hope, because if his dad won't stay for Sam he won't stay for anything. For a short moment it actually looks like it's working. 

His dad looks over to the bed where the eleven year old is sleeping, growing too long for the blanket that covers him. John smiles softly at his son, but then he turns away and straightens. 

"You're sixteen now Dean. You're old enough to take care of your brother." he hesitates, and Dean can actually see regret in his eyes. "I think we both know you've been more of a father to him than I have. 

Dean wants to argue, wants desperately to deny the statement and tell his father that; "of course not, you've been a wonderful father to him", it wouldn't be the truth though. The truth is that John hasn't been much of a father to him or Sam after their mother died almost eleven years ago. He works a lot, he is off planning and conspiring a lot, and when he returns he is often angry and frustrated. On those nights Dean only has enough time to send Sam away, before his dad uses him as a punching bag to release the frustration. 

"It doesn't have to be like that though, we can be a real family. Just don't go" he says instead, pleading with his dad one last time. 

John shakes his head defeatedly. "The Capitol stole any chance we had at being a normal family. I'm sorry Dean, I have to go. Take care of Sammy, and tell him I said bye." John takes one more look at his sons bloodied face, and Dean actually thinks he sees regret flashing in his fathers eyes before he closes his eyes, turns, and walks out the door. 

Dean understands that he has lost, their father has left and he couldn't stop him. He's failed Sammy again. A tear breaks free and slips down his face. He angrily wipes it away, and his hand comes back bloody. Right, he has to clean that up before Sammy wakes up. He desperately needs to focus on the things he can change, the things he can do something with. He knows he'll fall apart right now if he doesn't, and he hasn't got time for that. He'll deal with thoughts of his father another time. 

Dean is pretty sure Sam knows their father beats him, he's a smart kid. He always makes sure to clean up though. Sam might know whats going on, but Dean doesn't want him to actually have to face it. 

He leaves the room he shares with, now, only Sam, and enters the kitchen they share with three other families. When this building was made, each apartment had apparently been meant for only one family. Now one family resides in a private room, and the kitchen and washroom is shared. 

"Your dad leave to then?" a voice interrupts Deans thoughts and he nearly has a heart attack. 

He whips around and sees that Jo, daughter of the new family that moved in a week ago after the previous one had been kicked out, is standing by the kitchen table. She twists her  long blond hair in slim fingers, in what could be seen as a nervous gesture, except she doesn't seem much like the nervous type to Dean. When he looks closer though, he can see traces of tears on her cheeks. Normally he despises show of emotion, and generally avoids girls and their 'overly emotional tendencies'. He knows his own face has traces of both blood and tears though, and he doesn't judge her for it. 

He nods in reply to her question. "Yeah, off to look for" he trails off "I don't even know what he's looking for to be honest, revenge or something. He take your dad with him?

She sighs and nods back at him. "I don't think he so much took my dad with him as they decided on the whole thing together, dad's been talking about leaving for years." She shrugs as if deciding to accept it and focus on other things, much like Dean did before leaving his room. 

"Your dad do that?" She asks, gesturing to the half-dried blood all over Deans face and shirt.

Dean makes a face and grimaces at the dried blood cracking on his face. "Yeah, he didn't much appreciate my attempts to stop him. I need to get cleaned up before Sammy wakes up. He shouldn't remember his dad like this."

"Come on, I'll help you" Jo says, not arguing Deans hint that they won't ever se their fathers again. 

 

***

 

As it turns out, Dean is wrong. The previous night Jo had helped him clean up, and he had gotten a few hours sleep before he had to wake Sammy, explain to him where their dad was and take him to school. Sam's face had hardened as he took in Deans beginning black eye and swollen nose. When Dean explained that their dad had left and probably wasn't coming back Sam turned cold and told Dean in a detached voice; "Good, I don't ever want to see him again." Dean knows that isn't true, but he hadn't argued.

He is walking from the school on his way to work in the factory when he sees his dad. John is standing on the stage normally used only for the reaping. Next to him lies Jo's dad, in a pool of his own blood. The major is reading the charges against him; theft, attempted escape, treason. Before Dean has a chance to process what is happening one of the peacekeepers pulls out his gun and shoots his father in the face.

Dean has seen people die before. He has seen people wither away because of too little food and too much work. He has seen people frozen on the streets because they couldn't get warm. He has even seen the horrible, bloody murders in the games. It couldn't have prepared him for this though. For seeing his own fathers brains splattered all over the stage and one of the peacekeepers. 

He doesn't realize he's running until he hits something hard and comes to an abrupt stop. The something hard turns out to be Jo. There are a million things they could say, but they both know nothing would help them feel any better. 

Instead Dean holds out his hand. "Lets just go to work. We're going to need all the pay we can get, so we can't afford to loose our jobs." 

  

*ONE YEAR LATER*

 

Dean is hungry. He's hungry to the point where he isn't even hungry anymore, he is just nauseous and tired. He's been doing what he can for Sam since their father passed away. He went to the peacekeepers the day after to sign up for tesserae for himself and Sam. Meaning his name was added an additional 2 times to the reaping. It hadn't been enough though. 

The room he and Sam shares really isn't meant for only one income. Sam works after school, but It still isn't enough. The rooms all over town are meant for a family of at least four people, with at least three incomes. They had just managed when their dad was there, but now the money just doesn't cover it all. 

Dean has refused Sam to take out tesserae, and he doesn't tell him how bad the situation is. For the past month Dean has been giving Sam most of the grain he should be eating. All the money they earn goes into paying for their room. He always makes sure Sam has enough to eat, but today marks two weeks of no food for Dean.

He knows he has to eat soon. Knows because he can't walk to work anymore without having to sit down several times so he won't faint. Knows from seeing other people starve to death that he isn't far behind. Knows because he didn't get any sleep tonight because of the flies crawling all over him, flies he knows wasn't really there. 

He is sitting down for the fifth time on his way home from work when the peacekeeper approaches him. Dean doesn't even see him at first, too busy trying to make the dirty road in front of him stop spinning. When he does see the peacekeeper he's scared. He can't get in trouble, not now. 

"I'm sorry, just taking a breather. I'll be on my way." He says and tries to stand up. He is almost upright when he falls, but the peacekeeper catches him before he hits the ground. Imagine that, being seventeen and dying of starvation he thinks, not knowing if he should laugh or cry. 

"Why don't you come inside with me?" the peacekeeper offers. "I'll give you some food." 

Dean almost snorts, it certainly looks like the peacekeeper has enough of it. Fat people are hard to come by in district 8, but if you do find one it's most likely a peacekeeper. The man stares down at him with dull eyes. Waiting for a reply 

"I haven't got any money" Dean tells him, internally beating himself for saying this before the food, not after. He can't get in trouble with the law though, he needs to be there for Sam. One of the reasons he hasn't tried stealing food. 

"Oh, I'm sure you'll find another way to pay me back" the peacekeeper says, smiling. "All you have to do is lie there and look pretty."

Dean suddenly understand what the peacekeeper wants in return for the food. He knows he should feel disgusted, knows he should walk away and never return. He knows this, but all he feels is relief. Relief and stupid that he hasn't thought of this before. 

He has been working all the hours he can fixing machines at the factory, he isn't allowed to work more than he does. That doesn't mean he can't sell himself. Technically it's illegal, but the only ones interested in buying are the peacekeepers, and there are so many of them buying that the ones not interested doesn't bother arresting anyone for it. He won't get in trouble, Sammy won't get in trouble. They will keep their room and Dean won't die of starvation.  

"Yes" he says, "ok, show the way."

The peacekeeper half drags half carries Dean to his apartment. Most peacekeepers that have a family are given a house, but seeing as this one lives in an apartment he is most likely single. Not that it would make much of a difference either way.

When they walk through the door of the apartment Dean almost faints again, eyes swimming he tries to take in the place he just walked into. It's huge. Just from the door he can see a living room and three doors that most likely lead to a kitchen, bathroom and a bedroom. Just the living room is bigger than the whole quarter he shares with Sam and three other families. One of the walls in the living room is covered in books. Sam would absolutely love to get his hands one one of them. 

It's not that books are very rare in district 8, it's just that no one can really afford to own one. And the few families that did have used them to light the fireplace or tried to sell them off. 

"So" the peacekeeper says. "You give me a blow-job I'll let you have a meal." 

Dean has to fight hard not to throw up, not that it would have been anything but acid. The peacekeeper is licking his lips suggestively and looking at Deans mouth. Dean has to think fast. He doesn't know what the usual prices for prostituting oneself is, and he's scared to ask too much. He looks over at the books again, Sam's birthday is coming up and he would love a book. The peacekeeper doesn't look like the guy who reads anyways, so he probably wouldn't take much for it. 

"Two good meals and two books and I'll let you fuck me" he says, truly disgusted at himself for going through with this. 

The peacekeeper nods eagerly, witch again makes Dean think he's charging too little. He's too hungry to worry about that though. 

"You probably want to feed me first" he says instead, "unless fucking me unconscious does it for you."

He half hopes it will. Instead the peacekeeper just nods again. 

"Nah, I'd like you awake and screaming actually. Sit down over there" he says, pointing to a set of chairs at a table that Dean hadn't noticed before. 

Dean shudders and chooses to ignore the screaming comment, instead heading over to the table. The peacekeeper leaves through one of the doors and returns right after Dean's sat down, arms overloaded with food. 

"This is the two good meals you're getting. Eat what you want now, pick any two books and then come find me. I'll be in the bedroom. And don't take too long, I don't like to be kept waiting." The peacekeeper gives him a stern look before leaving through a different door. 

Dean looks at the food and is shocked. He'd asked for two good meals, and he had gotten what he and Sam could live of for at least four days. This is two good meals in the peacekeepers opinion? Or does he just see how starved Dean really is? He doesn't strike Dean as a man who feels pity. 

The table is covered in bread, cheeses, ham, chicken, apples, two oranges, a jar of jam, potatoes, a jug of milk, butter and what Dean suspects is cake of some sort. The only thing on the table that he has actually tasted before is bread, milk and cheese. And this looks completely different. He carefully picks up one of the many bread rolls and breaks it open.

The smell is overwhelming. It's fresh, warm and extremely tempting. Dean wants to shove the whole thing into his mouth at once. Wants to smell the oranges and the apples. Wants to try a little bit of everything. He remembers the Peacekeepers warning though, and he knows he will get sick if he eats too much. He carefully breaks off a bite and puts it in his mouth, and it is the most wonderful thing he's ever tasted. 

It takes all of Deans willpower not to shove his face with it. Instead he forces himself to take slow bites while he packs the remaining food in the bag he uses to carry tools at work. 

When the food is packed he brings the last part of his roll over to the bookshelf, contemplating what books to give Sam. He wants to give him something useful. Sam still has four months left of school before he starts to work full time. Until school finishes the kids are all factory workers, witch is the only thing they learn in school. When they finish at the end of august there is a test. A test that determines if you should continue as a factory worker or get one year in training to become weaver, designer, dress maker, teacher, tailor or something different. 

Dean had been lucky, and had been chosen for the "something different." He'd spent one year learning how to fix the machines used in the factories all over. 

Sam had mentioned wanting to be a teacher or a designer, but to be a teacher you had to score high on all the categories in the test. Also, Dean doesn't think Sammy would be happy teaching kids how to work in the factories all day long, and then send them off to that fate for the rest of their lives.  

One of the books catches his eye _The Basics of Designing - Principles, Techniques and Practice,_ after leafing through it, Dean puts it in his bag. He then continues searching for a second book. One part of his brain remembers the peacekeepers warning and begs him to hurry up, while the other begs him to take a really long time, to drag it out as long as possible. 

He doesn't have to think about it much before another book catches his eye though; _the Art of Fashion - Drawing, Sowing and Inspiration._ It looks perfect. Dean doesn't know much about fashion or designing, but these two books seem to cover what he knows as the basics. 

He slowly puts the second book in his now stuffed bag, and places the bag by the door. He wants everything to be ready to go when he has made his _payment._

He catches himself standing unmoving next to his bag for a minute. He doesn't want to think about what will happen once he gets into the peacekeepers bedroom. But he knows he has to go in there any second, and he knows he should have some rules for himself. He needs at least _one_ rule, if only to make him feel like he has some sort of control. He decides on no kissing. He will let this man fuck him. He will later suck on other mens dick and even pretend to enjoy it, if that's what they're into. But he will not let anyone kiss him. 

Dean squares his shoulders and head for the door he saw the peacekeeper enter earlier. And if he has to stop shortly before entering to wipe off a few tears no one will ever know.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long since the first update. I wanted to get a little longer into the story before posting more chapters, just in case I needed to change anything. So far there are 8 chapters, and I have more planned. I also have a sequel in mind. Please excuse any spelling or gramatical errors, as I don't have a beta. I've made some changes to chapter 1, but it's mostly just fixing some spelling errors.

Dean knocks carefully on the bedroom door before entering the room. 

The peacekeeper is laying on a huge bed in the middle of the equally huge room. When he sees Dean he stands up and starts taking off his uniform.

"Take off your clothes" he orders, and then as an afterthought "all of them." Dean nods and starts unbuttoning his shirt. 

"You can fuck me," he says, "but no kissing. Not on the mouth." The peacekeeper just nods, busy with taking off his pants. 

Dean is just taking off his shirt when he realizes the peacekeeper is now only in his underwear. The man really is disgusting, he looks even fatter out of his uniform and he has  grey hair absolutely everywhere, making Dean think the brown color of his hair must be dyed. 

Dean looks at the white discarded uniform on the floor and wishes the man would put it back on. Instead he kicks of his shoes and unbuttons his pants. He wants to be slow, haul out the time as long as possible, but he makes a jump decision to just shove off his pants and underwear at the same time. He knows it has to happen and it's better to get it over with. Rip of the bandaid. 

The peacekeeper looks him slowly up and down, and seeming pleased he orders Dean to get on the bed. Dean crawls onto the bed and positions himself on all four. He doesn't know much about gay sex, or sex at all for that matter. But he knows this is going to hurt. 

The peacekeeper crawls onto the bed behind him and he clenches his teeth. He knows he has to relax, and he desperately tries to do so. He can feel his muscles loosening a little bit, as he draws in a steady breath.

He feels exposed in a way he's never done before, and relaxing feels the hardest thing he could possibly be doing right now. He still forces himself to relax his muscles even more, drawing yet a steady breath.

He amazingly manages to remain relaxed when two rough hands grips his ass and separates the cheeks, exposing his hole. 

When the peacekeeper shoves in dry, he realizes his attempts where pointless. It hurts, he clenches up and it hurts even more, but he can't help his body's reaction to the intrusion.

Dean feels like he is being ripped apart, and when the peacekeeper immediately pulls out, only to slam back in he can't help the scream that tears out of him. 

Dean is silent after that. He bites his tongue until he can taste the blood, but he refuses to scream again. After a while it doesn't feel quite as dry, and Dean has a nasty suspicion that it's his own blood making up the lubrication. 

Silent tears escape Deans eyes as the peacekeeper slams in and out of him for what feels like forever. Occasionally grunting things like "soo good" and "aah, so tight". Dean passes the time counting the tears he can see falling to the bed.

By the time the peacekeeper finally moans and Dean can feel a wet heat inside him, he has counted thirty-seven teardrops. 

The peacekeeper pulls out of him and lies down on the bed. "You can clean up in there" he says, pointing to a door Dean hadn't seen when he entered "you can't leave my home looking like that." 

Dean just nods and limps his way over to his clothes and then into what turns out to be a bathroom. He takes a cloth and soaks it in water before starting to clean himself up. He starts with his upper body, washing away the sweat and the tears. He then moves to his legs. He's scared of cleaning his ass, scared of the pain it will cause.

He realizes he was right about his blood being lubrication when he finds a mixture of blood and semen running down his legs. His stomach convulses and he almost throws up, he hurriedly swallows it down before it escapes his mouth. He can't afford to loose the only food he's eaten in weeks. 

Dean cleans his legs, and the mess running down them before rinsing the cloth. Then he slowly, carefully brings it to his ass. And immediately wishes he hadn't. He bites his teeth and continues cleaning it though. The peacekeeper is right, he can't leave looking like this. 

When he's positive there is no more cum, blood or sweat to clean he rinses the cloth again. His ass is still bleeding though, and he doesn't want to stay here to wait for it to stop. 

He opts for shoving some toilet paper between his cheeks so he won't bleed through his pants. 

Before getting dressed Dean takes a look in the mirror, he and Sam doesn't own one so he doesn't see his reflection often. He really does look horrible. He can count his ribs, he is deathly pale, and he can se the beginnings of two hand-shaped bruises on his too visible hip bones.

He quickly dresses and arranges his hair, avoiding his dead looking eyes in the reflection, and exits the bathroom. He finds the peacekeeper half asleep on the bed. Dean desperately wants to leave. He wants to walk out of the door and never come back to this place. He knows that he's found the only way to keep a roof over his and Sam's head, and to keep them both fed though.

"If you or any of your friends require my services another time I will be where you found me today between 6 and 6.30 pm every day" he figures it's a good plan. He gets of work just before six, so he can stop there and wait on his way home. He'll just tell Sam he got a job doing whatever.

"Great," the peacekeeper says with a smile, and Dean doesn't understand how such a friendly expression can look so mean. "then I'll definitely see you again. You can show yourself out."

Dean doesn't need to be asked twice. He painfully makes his way out of the bedroom and into the living room. There he picks up his bag and leaves. 

He painstakingly tries to walk normally, thanking heaven for the fact that he is already bowlegged, and hoping it doesn't look too weird if he just adds a little too it. 

"Hi Dean" he hears a female voice shout from behind him. He considers ignoring the voice, recognizing it as Jo's, but he knows it's too late. She's seen him, and she knows he heard her. 

He turns and faces her instead. "Hi Jo, how are you?" He says, trying hard to act as his normal self. Although he's somehow he's all but forgotten what his 'normal self' is like. 

She ignores his question. "What are you doing here? You got off work and hour ago and this isn't even on your way.."

She stops talking and Dean can se her eyes drifting over his stuffed bag and his awkward stance. "home. Oh no, Dean you didn't? Please tell me you didn't." 

Dean feigns ignorance. But he knows it's probably too late. He and Jo has been best friends since they saw their fathers executed, and she is usually able to read him like a book.

"Did what? I haven't done anything. I'm just.. walking home. I got a job cleaning a peacekeepers house after work. And I need the extra cash." He knows as soon as he starts talking that she doesn't believe him.

"Dean, when did you start having sex for money?" she asks, tears in her eyes. Dean hasn't seen Jo cry since the night their fathers left. Not even when they saw them shot in the face on that stage. 

"I didn't.." he starts, but is interrupted before he can finish.

"Don't lie to me Winchester, don't even think about it!" Jo half shouts at him.

"Shh, be quiet" Dean says quickly. Then he decides to tell her the truth, knowing it's the only explanation she will accept. 

"I didn't do it for money. I needed food. And a birthday gift for Sammy."

"Dean" Jo says, a tear falling down her cheek. Sympathy and pleading fighting for room in her eyes. 

"Don't. Don't give me that look. And don't ask me to stop. Believe me, I want to." he says, voice breaking despite his effort to keep it even.

"Then why don't you stop Dean? You have a job. Sam will start working full-time soon. You don't have to do this."

Dean knows it's not fair, but he can feel his anger raising. This has been the worst day since he had to tell Sammy their father was dead, and he can't deal with it anymore. So he lashes out.

"Don't tell me I don't have to do this. Do you really think I would let some disgusting peacekeeper tear my ass open if I had another choice? I haven't eaten in two weeks Jo. All the money I make goes into paying for the room. And the food I get from my tesserae goes into feeding Sam. And before you ask, no, I'm not letting Sammy sign up for tesserae. He is never going into those horrible games. So yeah, I would like nothing more than to go home and forget this never happened. To never have to do it again. But this gets food on the table, and it gets Sammy books so he can have a chance at an actual future. I know he can get into the designer program, but that means another year of him working only part time. I can't ask him to give up his future, you know as well as I do that designers can earn _double_ of what a factory worker does. He's smart, and he deserves a chance."

Dean stops talking before he starts telling Jo about how he _has_ to give Sammy this chance, because it's his fault he never had it in the first place. Their mom wouldn't have been at the factory the night it burned down if she hadn't changed her shift to take Dean to his first day of school. And their dad wouldn't have left if only Dean had been a better son. 

Jo looks at him for a long time. Dean knows she probably wants to offer him help or food. But he also knows she can't, her family is barley getting by with what they have. After a while she nods.

"Ok Dean. I'll back up whatever cover story you want to tell Sam. I don't like this at all, but I get it, I do. I want to know when you're out doing this though, and I want to know when you're going to be home."

Dean almost cries in relief, she understands and she accepts him. Only now does he realize how scared he was that she would reject him for this. 

"Yes, yes of course. I'll tell you anything you want to know."

Jo nods in appreciation.

"I'll talk to a couple of the girls at work. I know they turn tricks after work. I'll ask about typical prices, who to avoid and who to approach. If you're doing this you should be as safe as possible."

Dean doesn't know what to say, so he just stares at her in awe. She's actually helping him out. 

"And I know that this will probably make you uncomfortable, but you need to find some sort of lubrication. And you need to learn how to stretch yourself. It looks like you're in a lot of pain right now, and that can't happen all the time."

She's right. It does make him uncomfortable, but he knows she's right about the rest of it too.

"Yeah, I know. I have a lot to learn here. I can probably get some oil for a blow-job or something, I think my ass needs a few days rest anyways." he says smiling, trying to lighten the mood. 

Jo allows him, even though they both know this is the beginning of a series of horrible experiences for Dean. 

Jo takes helps him carry his bag while Dean hobbles next to her. He's done pretending walking doesn't hurt. He'll have to do enough of that when he gets home. 

The rest of the way to the housing unit is silent, both of them knowing there is once again, nothing to say. Before entering their separate rooms Jo straightens Deans clothing and fixes his hair. 

"You can tell Sam that cleaning story, I'll back you up if he asks me about it. Just.. be safe." she says, walking into her room before he has a chance to answer. 

Dean takes a deep breath and slowly lets it out before walking into his own room. Sam is on the bed, writing something in his notebook. Something for school Dean thinks. 

"Hi Sammy, I have some great news" he says, forcing a smile on his face.

Sam groans, "Deaan, I'm almost thirteen years old now! I'm too old for you to call me Sammy. My name is Sam." he hasn't looked up at Dean yet, something Dean is grateful for. 

He gets a precious few moments to sit down in one of their chairs without Sam seeing his grimace. "Did you eat?" he asks his younger brother.

Suddenly Sam looks at him with teary eyes. "No Dean, I didn't. I want you to eat today." He says it with such determination that it actually scares Dean a little. 

"You've been saying that you ate before I woke up, and at work or before I came home. But I just did the math" he says pointing at his notebook. "What I'm eating is _all_ the food we get from your tesserae. Not half of it, not even most of it. ALL of it. You need to eat Dean. And I'm signing up for tesserae tomorrow as well."

Dean doesn't know what to say, Sam had noticed? And now he's signing up for tesserae? That is not going to happen.

"Sam.." he starts, but the person in question interrupts him.

"How long has it been since you've eaten Dean? Because according to my calculations it's been two weeks today, and that can't be right. It can't, can it?" The look in Sam's eyes is pleading with Dean to tell him his wrong, so Dean does.

"No of course not Sammy, that's ridiculous. A person can't survive that long without food. I'd be dead. Or at least hallucinating and fainting all over the place." Dean has been, but Sam doesn't need to know that. "You're right that I haven't been eating too much though, but like I said, I have some good news."

Dean can see that Sam is skeptical to his promise. That he desperately want's to believe him, but doesn't fully do it yet. So instead of letting Sam ask more questions Dean continues talking.

"I got another job, this lazy-ass peacekeeper doesn't want to clean his own home, so he's paying me to do it after I finish at the factory. He gave me a bunch of food, look"

And with that Dean starts pulling all of the food out of his bag, and Sam is immediately distracted. 

This time Dean takes his time, he smells the apples and the oranges. He dips his finger in the jam and sucks his finger clean, the sweet taste spreading in his mouth. He can see Sam doing the same thing on the other side of the table. 

Dean starts preparing a meal for them, he takes a bread roll for each and splits them in half. He putts butter on one half and cheese on the other. Then he cuts an apple in half and pours some milk. He considers a second before dropping a small amount of jam into the milk glasses. He knows they both needs the energy.

He then takes a piece of chicken and puts it on Sam's plate, but he doesn't take any for himself.

"Here you go Sam", he says, putting the plate in front of his brother. He waits to sit down again until Sam is distracted by the food, he knows he won't be able to help the flinching.

"What, no chicken for you? Dean you have to eat!" Sam says, refusing to start on his food. 

"I had some while I was cleaning" Dean explains "and as you pointed out, I haven't been eating too much. I need to start slow."

Sam looks at him, considering. "Then I won't eat it either, we'll both have some tomorrow" he says, pushing the chicken to the end of his plate. 

"Don't be ridiculous Sam, it's going to go bad. Eat your chicken. I'll have some tomorrow."

They sit and eat in silence for a while, and when they finish they both stumble towards their beds. Full for what feels like the first time in their lives. "Night Dean, thank you." Sam whispers before they both fall asleep, hours earlier than they normally do.


	3. Chapter 3

Dean wakes up the next day feeling pains and aches all over his body, he slowly stretches out his arms and legs testing his bruises. Despite the pain of his new trade though, he can’t help but feel pleased. For the fist time since their father left he feels fully rested and fed. He'd forgotten how good it felt to actually have food in his stomach.He hasn’t opened his eyes yet, but he can hear Sam shuffling around, probably preparing breakfast with the food they have left over. Mentally preparing himself Dean opens his eyes.

“Morning Sam, sleep well?” He says with a grin to his younger brother.

“You know it” Sam answer somewhat distracted by brushing his hair out of his face.

“You need to let me cut that hair, at this point it’s just sad.”

Sam doesn’t dignify the remark with an answer, they both know this is a fight Dean has lost already. Both brothers deprived of protein they decide to eat rolls with ham for breakfast. They eat as slow as they can justify, just savoring the taste of the food. Dean considers giving Sam the books now, but decides on doing it tomorrow, on his actual birthday. He has the cake saved as well. He can’t help but smile at the prospect of finally giving Sam a real birthday. 

Dean thanks his luck that Sam has to leave for school a bit before he needs to leave for work. He desperately needs to clean up, the paper he stuffed between his cheeks is still there. He can feel it, hard and dried in some places, and soggy and dissolved in others. He knows he can't show Sam his body though, so he has to do it after the kid leaves. Because they’re both lost in enjoying their breakfast though, Sam doesn’t leave until the last possible moment. 

When he finally does leave, running outside to meet Ash, Jo's younger brother, Dean finally relaxes his tensed muscles. Consequently he winces in pain, no longer worried about displaying discomfort he hobbles into the kitchen to fill a bowl of water so he can clean himself.

He is used to treating his own injuries, hiding his pain from Sam, and throwing out the blood stained cloths. How could he not be used to that after their dad. What he's not used to is the injury being in his ass. 

He removes the paper, and throws it away without looking at it, because.. gross. He carefully cleans away the dried blood and washes his underwear. It hurts, but not as much as yesterday. He still swears to only give out blow-jobs for at least a couple of days. He also realizes he has no idea how to give anyone a blow job. At that thought he has to force himself not to loose his breakfast. The idea of some stranger shoving their dick down his throat and him working to make it pleasurable makes him shudder. 

Forcibly shoving his thoughts out of his head Dean finishes cleaning himself up, as well as he can, and heads out to meet Jo so they can walk to work together. 

"Morning Dean, Sam buy your story last night?" She asks as a way of greeting him.

"I think so, kid's smart though. Did some calculations or something and realized that with the food we have and what he's eaten I couldn't have eaten in two weeks. I told him it was bullshit, but I don't think he believed that part."

"Yeah, Ash does that too. They're both too smart for their own damn good" Jo says with a laugh. 

"Listen, I'll talk to some of the girls at work today, can you meet me after? I'll write a list of who to avoid, who to contact and what you can charge. If you're still insisting on doing this?" She makes the last part a question, but Dean doesn't bother answering it. They both know he doesn't have a choice.

"Thanks Jo, it means a lot, really does." 

"You look better today Dean, I'm glad you at least got some food in you. Although the limp is rather telling to be honest. Anyone ask you about it, tell them I kicked you in the balls. Not like you don't deserve it" She says with a smirk.

***

Work isn't easy, his job involves a lot of walking, sitting and bending in awkward positions trying to reach whatever part of the machine needing of a repair. It all hurts like a bitch. When the bell tolls signaling the end of his shift he breathes out a relieved sigh and heads outside to meet Jo. He doesn't think he's ever been so glad for a shift to end, yet so angry that it has. He really doesn't want to head over to his new job. 

Jo is already waiting for him at the corner they agreed to before work. She doesn't look happy. He slowly approaches her.

"Hi Jo. What's wrong?" he asks.

"Ash is sick, they called me at the factory. Apparently he has a cut on his leg that never healed right. It's infected." It looks like she's about to start crying, and two times in two days is just to much for Dean if he’s honest. He doesn’t deal to well with emotional stuff.

"Then what are you doing here? I can improvise or something with clients. You don't have to look after me today Jo. Go home to your brother."

"I want to, but he needs antibiotics, and we can't afford it." Jo takes a deep breath, and seems to steel herself. "I'm coming with you to work Dean. I need the money."   
Something in Dean snaps. He will not, under any circumstance allow his best friend to do that to herself. He suddenly understands Jo's reaction yesterday much better.

"No, no you're not. I was going to get you some money anyways. For helping me out with this, getting me some names. Go home to your brother, I'll get the antibiotics. Just make sure Sam eats something." 

Dean can tell that Jo is torn. She doesn't want Dean to have to do this for her, but she want's to take care of her brother. 

"Jo, I'm already doing this. I'm already too far gone. You're not. This is a one time thing. You're not going to need the extra cash all the time, it's just this once. I'm going to be selling my body frequently now. One more time isn't going to make much of a difference either way.”   
Dean rushes through the admissions, hoping she’ll just believe him. Because he really doesn’t want to defend his reasoning right now. He knows he’s right. Jo looks at him, and the tears are streaming down her face now. Dean wants to sigh, crying two days in a row is really un-Jo like.

"Thats the thing Dean, it's not going to be one time. I have the price-list here. What you can expect from your" she hesitates "services. To buy the antibiotics you're going to have to fuck two people. Two Dean, I can't ask you to do that! Especially now. You're still hurting from yesterday."

"Go home Jo, just, go home. I've got this, it's ok." And just because he knows she won't take the favor without giving something back he says "Just promise me that if something ever happens to me you'll take care of Sam. We're family Jo, we look out for each other."

She finally seems to accept it. "Thank you Dean, just, thank you! You're saving both me and Ash, I hope you know that."

She hands him a few pieces of paper, and points to one at a time while she explains.

"These are the ones you definitely want to avoid. Some will arrest you, some will be too violent and some will just beat you up for offering." She points to a new list.  
"These are the ones you want to seek out, they're interested in men and they will pay a fair price. I can't promise they will all be gentle though." she points to the last of the lists.  
"This is what you can expect as payment. You might get a little more or a little less depending on who you're working with though."

Dean looks closer at the lists in his hands. "Thanks Jo, now go home. Ash needs you."

Jo leaves without saying anything else, she just smiles at him and runs towards their housing unit.   
Dean looks over the lists she has given him and decides to go where he told the peacekeeper he would be yesterday, and then, if no one shows, try to find some of the men on the list.   
He starts walking towards his "spot", dreads letting someone tear into his already to sore ass. He knows he has to though, he loves Jo, and by extension Ash. He needs to do what he can to take care of them. 

He looks down at the price-list again, the payment of 50 coins would normally last him and Sam two or three days, but medicine is expensive. It looks like he won't have to do this every day though, and he and Sam has enough food to get by for a couple more days if they are careful. Today he needs to focus on getting the medicine for Ash.  
When he arrives at the corner where he met the peacekeeper he doesn't have to wait long until he is approached.   
Another peacekeeper in a white uniform stands in front of him, looking him up and down. Maybe checking if he's good enough. 

"My colleague told me about you" he says, now walking around Dean to stare at his ass. 

"He told me about your nice tight ass, and that you don't fight back. He told me you where bleeding, but that you only screamed once. I like that in a guy. What I want is a little" he stops looking for the right word. "unorthodox. I would like to be in total control of you. You would need to follow all of my orders, and I will inflict pain. I will also pay more than what you would get from others." 

Dean has to think fast. On his note it says that he can expect 50 coins from a quick, normal fuck. The medicine he needs is 100 coins. 

"I need to make 100 coins today, I can do whatever you need and you can pay me that, or I can get two quick fucks and easy payments off someone else. From what I hear your needs seems worth the price." He tries to sound confident, like he's done this before. He doesn't think he succeeds. 

"Give me 100 coins and I'm yours for an hour. Just avoid marking my face and hands. Oh, and I don't kiss. Not on the mouth."   
Dean has to admit he's scared. This guy gets off on inflicting pain on others. But then again, Dean is used to being beat. He can deal with that. What he can't deal with is the unfamiliar pain and humiliation of being fucked. This is one guy instead of two. It has to be better. 

"How about this" the peacekeeper offers. "I will give you 120 coins and a bottle of oil for your, uhm, later adventures. But every time you disobey me I will subtract ten coins from the payment."  
Dean hesitates, it sounds like a too good deal.

"I don't know man, when something sounds too good to be true, it usually is." he tells the peacekeeper.  
The man, to his surprise laughs. "Smart kid. I have a lot of money, and I'm willing to spend it to get what I want. I should warn you though. The last kid i hired was very unsatisfactory. I gave him the same deal, and he left my home with ten coins total. I don't like being disobeyed. 

Dean figures he'll give it a shot. How hard can it be following orders anyways. He can even disobey two times and still get what he needs for the medicine. 

"Fine, where do you want to do this?" he asks.

The peacekeeper leads him a different way than the last one had. Through a part of town that Dean has never been to before. There are no factories here, so there is no reason for him to go here.   
After walking for about ten minutes the peacekeeper leads him into an apartment, and to Deans amazement it's even bigger than the one he was in the day before. 

"I have to warn you." The peacekeeper say as soon as he's shut the door. "When we begin you will be mine for an hour, I will follow the rules you set, and I won't hurt you so bad you can't do your day job. But you will not be able to leave until the hour is up. Even if you mess up so much you will have no payment. That's the deal. You still in?" 

Dean just nods, doesn't allow himself to think about it. "Yeah, let's do this."

Suddenly the peacekeeper seems to change. His easygoing smile disappears and is replaced by a stern face. 

"Take off your clothes and follow me into the bedroom. You have one minute." he says before walking off into one of the many doors in the apartment. 

Dean doesn't have time to study the apartment, he doesn't want to be late, and he doesn't have a watch, so he rips of his clothing as fast as he can and hurries into the bedroom. He doesn't want to disobey an order already. As he enters the room the peacekeeper looks up from his watch, seaming pleased. 

"Get on your knees" he orders, and Dean, used to simply doing what his dad tells him, drops to his knees right where he is.

"Good boy Dean, you're the first boy not to ask me where to get on your knees. Blind obedience, I like it."

Dean doesn't say anything. He doesn't know if he's allowed to talk. The peacekeeper hasn't mentioned anything about it, but his dad would always get mad if he talked without permission. 

"I want you to suck me off now Dean, You're going to crawl over here and suck my dick. I know this is your first time so I will set some rules for you. Do not touch me unless I tell you to, do not pull off unless I tell you to, do not make a sound unless I tell you to. Nod if you understand."

Dean nods and starts crawling towards the man. He feels naked, humiliated and exposed. The orders makes it a little easier though, he doesn't have to wonder what he's doing. Or even think about it. He can just do what he's told. 

When he gets to the peacekeeper he sits up, and without thinking, puts the older man's member into his mouth. The taste hits him immediately, and it it every bit as disgusting as he feared when he thought about it in the morning. Dean doesn’t have time to dwell on it though because the peacekeeper immediately pushes forward. Deans first instinct is to pull away. He can't breathe, and he feels a strange mix of chocking and needing to throw up. Thankfully he doesn't do the things his body is begging him to. Instead he moves his tongue and sucks.   
He hasn't been told to move, so he doesn't. The peacekeeper seems to appreciate it, and soon starts fucking Deans face. 

It gets easier after a while, the need Dean feels to throw up decreases and he suspects his gag reflex is being ruined. Not that he had much to begin with, when you have to eat the most disgusting things just to stay alive a gag reflex doesn't do you much good.

He tries breathing through his nose, but it's hard. When the peacekeeper finally pulls out he gasps for air, but makes sure not to move or make a sound. 

"Good boy" the peacekeeper says again. "No go over to my drawers there" he says pointing. "Fetch the whip and butt-plug from the bottom drawer." 

Dean immediately starts crawling towards the drawers, the peacekeeper hadn't told him he could get up. He's still gasping for air, and he desperately wonders how he will know what the butt-plug is. He's never even heard of that before. He's relieved when he opens the drawer. He knows what most of it is, so he can do a process of elimination. He takes out the whip, at least he knows what that is. There is also something that looks like a gag, a blindfold, cuffs, rope, clamps of some sort and a penis shaped rubber toy. Dean doesn't remember the name for it, but he knows it's not a butt-plug. 

The only thing in the drawer that he doesn't know what is now is a black plastic thing that he supposes could be used to, plug a but, or something.   
He pulls it out, hoping it's the right thing. He soon discoveries he has a problem carrying this stuff, while crawling to the bed. He hasn't been told he can get up though, so he puts the whip in his mouth, and crawls one handed to the bed. Clutching the, hopefully, butt-plug in his hand.

"Again, very good boy" the peacekeeper compliments. "not many has been able to do that. Way too many chose to get up and walk. Disobeying idiots." He smiles at Dean. "Get on the bed with me, and get on all fours."

Dean does as his told, he knows he should be worried, but the orders make it easier. He doesn't really have to focus too hard. When he is on the bed, kneeling on all fours as ordered the peacekeeper takes the toys from him. 

"Spread your knees and put your head down on the mattress. Turn your head to the side, and suck on this." Dean does as his told, and is presented the butt-plug. Apparently the man wants him to suck it, so he does. It tastes a little of soap, and Dean is really grateful for the fact that it has been cleaned. 

After sucking on the toy for a while the peacekeeper pulls it from his mouth, and quickly, without warning shoves it in his ass. It hurts, Dean can't decide if it hurts more or less than being fucked. On one hand the plug is smaller than a dick, and he has at lest some lubrication this time. His ass is still really sore though, and he can feel the barley healed tears from last night opening up again. Dean feels the need to gasp it out as the pain in his ass slowly becomes more insistent, he can feel droplets of blood running down his thighs. He's scared he's breaking some unspoken rule by bleeding on the bed, but he really can't help it. 

"It's ok Dean, you're allowed to get hard. But, Do. Not. Come. Not unless I tell you it's ok. You're the first boy to be able to get to this point without disobeying, and good boys are rewarded."

Dean sucks in a panicked breath, he's expected to get hard? He doesn't think he can do that. Not with blood running down his thigh and a stranger behind him holding a whip. How can anyone even think he would be hard? This has to be the most humiliating and painful experience of his life. 

Dean stays perfectly still, not making a sound, hoping the peacekeeper won't notice his limp dick. Before he has time to decide how he should proceed he feels a sharp pain on his ass and lower back. The peacekeeper is using the whip, and Dean has to bite his tongue bloody not to shout out.   
It hurts with kind of a burning and stinging pain, similar to his fathers belt, he realizes. Dean stops that line of thought before it can get out of hand, he doesn't need to deal with two beatings at the same time. Another sharp whip, Dean draws in a sharp breath, but makes sure not to make a sound.

"You like this don't you Dean" the peacekeeper laughs. "You're a total slut for the way I make you feel." 

He smacks Dean over the ass again. "Answer Dean, and tell the truth."

Dean considers for a short second telling the truth, telling the peacekeeper that No he really doesn't fucking like being beaten, but he strongly suspects that isn't the answer the man want's. Dean can lie, he's good at lying. 

"Yes, gah" he can't help the pained moan he releases when the man smacks him again now that he is already talking, he hopes it can pass as a pleasured moan. "Yes, I like it."

He can practically hear the peacekeeper smirking. Dean hears another smack, and the pain soon follows. He can't help the tears streaming down his face, because it hurts. Fuck it hurts. Without warning the plug is ripped from his ass, and the pain there is suddenly renewed. 

"You don't have to be quiet anymore now Dean, I want to hear you."

Dean immediately lets out the whimper he's been holding in since the plug was removed. He really hopes the man will confuse pained whimpers and moans with pleasured ones, because Dean really isn't sure how well he can fake it at this point. 

"Good boy" the peacekeeper says yet again, and then he pushes into Dean.

Dean was expecting the same sharp pain he had experienced yesterday, but somehow it's much worse. He suspects the plug has stretched him somewhat, but it really doesn't help. His ass is sore and bleeding already and the constant friction of the peacekeeper pulling out and pushing back in feels like sandpaper. Dean needs the peacekeeper to get off as quick as possible, that way it will stop right? He moans, begs and pants, hoping the noises will make the man orgasm sooner. The peacekeeper must have picked up the whip at some point, because suddenly Dean hears the sound he now thinks he can recognize anywhere, and feels the stinging pain across his back. This time he doesn't have to stay silent, so he shouts out. 

"Count them for me" demands the peacekeeper. 

"One" Dean pants out, wondering how he's going to be able to keep count on top of everything else. The peacekeeper keeps slamming into him, tearing the old wounds in his ass and probably adding new ones. Dean hears the smack and feels the pain across his shoulder blades. 

"Gahh, two" he moans out. The tears are still streaming down his face, he knows the peacekeeper can see it, but he doesn't make any attempt to stop them.

Smack, "three," smack, "four." 

Another smack, and the worst pain yet. "FUCK, ah, five" Dean stammers out.

At some point the pain whites out, and Dean isn't really aware of what's happening anymore. His back and ass feels like white hot flames are licking them, the only measure of time passing is his own voice counting out the hits. When he sobs out "twenty seven" he can finally feel the peacekeeper coming inside him, and he's glad. It would be a disaster if the man didn't come. When it's all over Dean thanks the heavens that he hasn't moved. He hasn't gotten permission for that yet.   
The peacekeeper pulls out of him and sits up. 

"Our hour just finished Dean, you're free to do as you please now."

Dean lets out a relieved sigh and falls down flat on the bed.


End file.
